Firm, loose, somewhere in between. We all have them, and we have boundaries of varying strength with the different people in our life. Sometimes we are ‘too nice’ or ‘too forgiving’ with the one’s we love, and too rigid with acquaintances or colleagues, when in fact, it’s the ones we love that can take advantage of us and hurt us the most. This mostly occurs because of those loose boundaries. How does this even make sense in a just world?
Why is it that it’s easy (easier) to tell a toxic person in your life that they are bringing you down, making you crazy, emotionally and/or intellectually hurting you, and that you need some space, but difficult to do the same with family? Is it because we share the same blood? Does that make it okay for them to hurt us? Is that any reason to allow them to continue their path of destruction? How do we draw that line in the sand and ask (tell, demand) that it not be crossed?
There is some psychological trickery that forces us to believe that since we are born as a pack with these others, we must stay connected to them. I get it, blood is thicker than water, but when is it necessary to draw the line? And why is there so much guilt associated with taking that space?
How does one develop the Ego strength to love oneself enough to put an end to the hurts without being the ‘bad guy’ in the relationship?
For help establishing healthy boundaries in your relationships, feel free to contact me at Rita@SoSWorkshopSeries.com